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About Literature / Hobbyist Premium Member HeatherFemale/United States Group :iconfanficwriters-united: FanficWriters-United
Fixing what canon f*cked up!
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Medical Update

Fri Nov 21, 2014, 1:39 PM
  • Mood: Sorrow
  • Watching: Aladdin
  • Drinking: Rum & Coke


Yeah, yeah.... I know... two journals in one day. Deal with it, lol. This one is a general update, going out to everyone and not just those who follow me for Dragon Age stuff.

So, first of all: I again apologize for the HUGE lack of updates. I know I've said before that I'm not doing well in the health area, but this time let me give you a bit more detailed explanation of what's going on.

As some of you already know, I received a kidney transplant three years ago after a six-year wait. Five of those years, I was on dialysis. Being on dialysis that long can do some screwy things to your parathyroid gland, but once you're off it's supposed to go back to normal.

This has not been the case for me. The high end of normal for parathyroid hormone levels is 60. Mine are still sitting in the 150 range, which is nearly triple that (in fact it did go back up to 180 briefly last year). I've been seeing an endocrinologist about this issue for over a year now, and we're perplexed. A recent scan of my parathyroid came back negative, my vitamin D levels are normal - a bit on the low side of normal, but still normal. There's no apparent reason for this to be happening, and yet it is.

So what are the symptoms? Constant fatigue, hair loss, chronic headaches, pain in the bones of the limbs, high blood pressure, mood swings, general feeling of malaise, worsening memory, depression, and lack of concentration - which are just some of them, but those are all symptoms I have been dealing with for over a year now.

As you might have guessed, the ones hitting me the worst when it comes to my writing are the lack of concentration and the depression. These days, I can only really get a few paragraphs out - maybe a page, on a good day - before I lose my focus. It's extremely frustrating, when I used to write 4,000-7,000 words at a time. However, I'm not going to force myself to keep writing through the lack of focus because then I would just end up putting out something I'm not happy with just to get it out there and that wouldn't be fair to any of you who are reading it.

When I'm feeling depressed.... yeah... I've come very close to deleting everything I've been working on more than once in the past few months. (Thankfully, if I ever actually do that I have backups for when I finally come to my senses.)

It's truly frightening because something I've always loved doing is now something I can barely manage to do any more. It feels like I'm losing a huge part of who I am, and it really sucks. And right now... no one can seem to figure out a way to stop this.

I'm going to be trying to get some things finished and uploaded here soon. Hopefully, the quality won't be suffering too much. I appreciate everyone who has been waiting patiently on updates for the things I have been working on. I know it's been forever since I updated anything, and I feel horrible about that. But, yeah... I'm just feeling horrible, in general, these days. I'm sure some out there won't see that as any excuse, but there you have it.

Much love to those who are still hanging around. I'll do my best to make your wait worth it.

Design & Code by Celvas
Great many thanks to Kiam

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ParisWriter
Heather
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
Name: Heather
DOB: June 29
Astrological sign: Cancer
Chinese Astrology: Water Dog
Home base: Pennsylvania
Where I wish my home base was: Somewhere warmer. Seriously...We have four seasons here: almost winter, winter, still winter, and construction. Right now, it's August and barely 60 degrees here.

Why ParisWriter? Well... Obviously, I'm a writer. So that's where that part comes from. Paris is after the French capitol, where I spent two days on a school trip when I was 15. I absolutely fell in love with the city. Someday, I hope I can go back on my own terms so I can really experience it without being rushed around.

What is Creative ADD? Creative ADD is a term coined by myself to describe the affliction that some writers have where your brain is just so over-run by ideas that you keep jumping around from one to the next and eventually end up with a dozen or so unfinished stories that you swear you will finish someday... though you can't exactly say if 'someday' will be in six months or six years. What's worse, you still keep coming up with more ideas, no matter how hard you try to stop.

How long have you been writing? Since I was seven. We had to write a story in our computer class in elementary school, and since it was around Halloween I wrote one about a house that basically killed everyone who went into it. (Whoever went inside was never seen again.) What can I say? I guess I've always had a leaning toward the darker things...

How long have you been writing fanfiction? I didn't even know what fanfiction was until my family first got the internet when I was 14. I wrote my first story - a really bad Highlander fic which, thankfully, no longer exists - when I was 15. I didn't really write much more fanfiction after that until I was 23, when I first fell very ill with kidney disease and spent a lot of time in bed with my laptop. So... Let's say about eight years I've been writing fanfiction.
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:iconamour-raven:
amour-raven Featured By Owner Nov 7, 2014  Student Writer
I hope all is well, dear! In Love 
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:iconsavvid:
Savvid Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy (belated? :XD:) birthday!!!!!! Have your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooPartyHave your cake and eat it tooParty I hope you had a great day!! :hug: I wish you aaaaaall the best!!! :glomp:
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:iconchatterbox010:
CHatterBOx010 Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2014  Student Writer
Happy Birthday!!!!! :tighthug: :party: :party: :party:
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:icongothikuk:
gothikuk Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2014
happy birthday sweetie x
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:iconxenophile10:
Xenophile10 Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2014  Student Writer
Happy Birthday!!! :cake::party:
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